Things didn’t work out the way he planned.  Uncharacteristically, his test performance was sub-par. He barely got through.  This was a smart,

well-prepared individual, and it was hard for everyone, the student included, to understand what went wrong.

“Here’s where the 3 legged stool came in,” the teacher said. “The student was certainly confident– he was experienced with the procedure.  That leg was strong. But although he tried to keep a good ‘game face’ and appear like everything was all right, he was quite upset about the family situation. In other words, he wasn’t calm.  But the really wobbly leg was his focus–he was thinking about the people in his family, the lost loved one, and having to catch a plane to get to the funeral. His attention wasn’t on the test.”

The teacher had performed a great service to the student by framing the test experience in this way. He elevated the discussion to a much more meaningful level than just a grade.  The teacher helped the student to look at his own experience in a way that had meaning, and implications well beyond his training. Through the lens of the 3-legged stool the teacher guided the student to understand what’s truly going on. His ability to focus was severely weakened in this particular circumstance.

In the course of our daily lives, in and out of work, we are all faced with challenges big and small. Sometimes these challenges are in the work itself, sometimes they are simply part of life. The 3 legged stool is a secure platform on which we can handle any of these challenges.  Calm, confident and focused.

Ultimately, tests are not just about learning the right “stuff,” they are about continuing to grow and live  to our full potential.

Calm, confident, focused

On November 4, 2008, 66 million people elected Barack Obama the 44th president of the United States.
How did he, a young man with a brief resume, make this dream come true?

All the pundits weigh in: “He’s smart.” “He’s savvy.” “He put together a great team.” “He raised a phenomenal amount of money.” All true, but not the whole truth. Through my eyes as a performance coach I see something more fundamental.

Obama has all three traits that I discuss in this workbook. He is calm, confident and focused, and that makes people trust him and believe in him. He never loses his cool, he never seems dejected or bitter at a loss, and it certainly doesn’t make him lose steam and he is never off-message. Obama’s story is especially amazing when you take in the challenges he had to overcome—an African American with little money, virtually no experience on the international stage, and with the middle name Hussein.

Calm, confident and focused. To many this combination seems elusive and mystical, improbable to achieve. Not so. Barack Obama wanted the presidency and on the path to achieving his goal he had to pass many tests. He passed them all with these invaluable traits.

Not everyone wants to be president. But anyone can learn to be calm, confident and focused. We all have that potential.
You too can cultivate these qualities. You too can succeed at even the most difficult tests.

Let me show you how.

When you use The Workbook for Test Success you are investing in a tool kit. It will give you what you need — not only for the school tests you have to face — but for the tests we all face. The tests of daily life.

Share with us your stories of facing tests and being calm, confident and focused.

He never loses his cool, he never seems dejected or bitter at a loss, and it certainly doesn’t make him lose steam and he is never off-message.

He is a good role model for facing important tests: staying calm, keeping confident, and being focused is the key.

These are the skills that should be part of any leadership training. Leaders are constantly tested. They have to face moment-by-moment challenges, and we trust that they will do that. Have you ever considered that we are really trusting them to stay calm, confident and focused?  Imagine a leader who is tense, doubtful and distracted.  That doesn’t define “leader.”  Calm, confident and focused do.

If you are in a leadership position, or you are training others to be leaders, consider that for the vitality of the organization and the well-being of its members, you want to cultivate the three qualities in The Workbook. We want, and value, leaders who stand on a sturdy three-legged stool. Leaders who are calm, confident and focused.

What are the qualities you value in a leader?

Is fear derailing you?

The more I work as a test prep performance coach the more I see how fear not only derails test takers, but immobilizes them. It is the single biggest cause of poor test performance.

What are they afraid of?  (And if you’re a fearful test taker and are reading this: what are you afraid of?) Doing poorly?  Failing?  Not living up to standards?  All kinds of consequences like not getting into the college of you choice, not qualifying for a scholarship, making someone (a teacher, parents, our yourself) disappointed?

While there may certainly be consequences of a less-than-standard test performance, being afraid not only makes the entire experience of studying for the test and taking it very tense and disturbing, it actually does not help.

Although there may be a motivating factor in having some fear (”Man, I’ve got to start studying!”), being fearful has no positive effect.  Why? Because fear is a separating, disconnecting force. When you are in fear you are pulling away.  But on a test you have to be present. If you pull away you won’t be able to think rationally, and you won’t be able to answer questions correctly.

Fear also is all-encompassing. It takes over body, mind and spirit. The body because tense and hyped up, the mind is filled with negativity, and the spirit is distracted.  Not a pretty picture for a test taker.

What should you do if you find yourself fearful about an upcoming test, or if you become afraid during a test.

First, remember this : worry never produce anything except more worry.

Next: use the tools:  breathe, get yourself grounded; see your highest, best, brightest self, giving you a positive and accurate message. Tackle what you have to do with small manageable steps.  These are some of the tools in the book.  All of them work. You have to work them. You don’t have to use all of them. Play with them. Try them out. See which one suits you better. Don’t be afraid to experiment with different tools.

Fear separates you from your possibility. Don’t get swept up in it. You are not the fear. If it comes, acknowledge it and takes steps in a positive, nourishing direction.  You can do it.  And don’t let your fear tell you you can’t!

One thing I’ve noticed over and over again with people who have trouble with tests– they are flipping from the past (”Oh no, I didn’t study the right things”) to the future (”If I fail I’m going to lose my scholarship”). Though both statements may be true, going in either direction (past or future) is not helpful when you’re taking a test. At that moment, when you are reading and answering questions, you want and need to be one place and one place only: in the present.

Only by being present can we  do the job we need to do, at that moment. Only by being present can we develop the awareness that we’re veering off track, and then get back on track.

How many times in your life have you had to admit that you screwed up because you didn’t show up?

There is a real correlation between awareness and excellence, but awareness doesn’t happen accidentally. Usually, our minds are wandering far from home, as I said above,  leap-frogging from the past into the future, oblivious to what’s in front of us. To cultivate
awareness and achieve your highest potential, you have to train yourself.

Taking tests in a classroom, much as we may hate it, actually has a silver lining. It trains us to bring our awareness to bear on the present moment and to practice being calm, confident and focused.

When you learn how to master yourself in the tense environment of test taking, you will feel empowered to take those skills out of the classroom and into the rest of your life. You will have taught yourself to be strong, responsible and embodied when confronted with a difficult and challenging task. You can use that knowledge anywhere you go.

As long as you are willing to do the work to become a successful test taker, I can coach you through the process.

Here’s an exercise for you: Close your eyes. See yourself taking a test. Now see that you come upon a very difficult test question and you start worrying about what will happen if you don’t score well. See that you are veering off track and stop. Take a breath. Get yourself back on track. See yourself re-reading the question, slowly, thoughtfully. Now see yourself using what you know to answer the question as best you can.

Stay in the present!  It’s the only place you really are when you’re performing.  You might want to check out the tools for being calm, confident and focused in the book. Each and all the tools are designed to get you back to where you need to be: right here, right now.

Excellent reading. This book helped me to focus not only on academic tests, but also in various situations of my life. It is amazing how a simple tip such as “don’t forget to breathe” could make all the difference in my performance. Dr. B hits the nail on the head when describing all the rollercoaster of emotions that a GMAT, GRE, LSAT and other standardized tests can cause in a student.  I particularly enjoyed the exercises and recommend this book for anyone.

I’m particularly glad the reader picked up on how the book applies to a whole host of tests as well as life situations. Isn’t the “rollercoaster of emotions” she references something we all experience, at some point, every day?

Life is full of tests, some big, some small. To know that THE WORKBOOK is truly helping someone is very gratifying indeed.

Please send in your thoughts, comments and questions about the tests you are facing. I look forward to responding to them.

For the Google Books review see:
http://books.google.com/books?id=HOZwPgAACAAJ&dq=Test+Success+Ben+Bernstein&ei=331FS_7mNanUkgSJ7JztDQ&client=firefox-a&cd=1

For the Amazon reviews:
http://www.amazon.com/Workbook-Test-Success-Confident-Focused/product-reviews/098199590X/ref=sr_1_1_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1

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More

Common answers are “success,” “happiness” or “satisfaction.”

While these are all worthwhile goals, here’s what I have come to believe: the purpose of your life is to face every challenge, every test, as a chance for you to become the person you are meant to be.

Life is a test for you to become your highest self.

When you want a flower to grow in your garden, you go to the nursery and buy a packet of seeds. You can see exactly what you’re going to end up with because there is a beautiful color picture of the fully-grown flower on the front of the packet.

But when you open it, what do you find?

Tiny black lumps that look like mouse droppings. Does that discourage you? No, because you know what these seeds are meant to become.

You set up the environment for the seeds to grow. You prepare the soil.

You plant the seed, and then make sure you give it the right amount of sunlight and water. When that tiny seedling finally sprouts, it is delicate, and you protect it andcare for it until it grows into the flower it is meant to be.

I believe that somewhere inside you there is a seed packet with your picture on it, a picture of the fully realized you.

It’s not easy to grow this flower. There are endless challenges along the way. But when you face them, you learn from them and you grow with them.

Through this process, you grow into the flower in full bloom.

Flowers cannot become fully realized unless they push their way up through the soil and compete for sun and space with other plants.

Our conditions aren’t much different. We have to find our way in the world, and all along we face tests of physical illness, mental troubles, financial reversals, unfulfilled expectations and loss.

Here’s a helpful exercise to start your day: close your eyes. Breathe out three times. Look into a mirror. See there your highest self, your shining self, you at your best. Notice what that looks and feels like. Listen as your highest self gives you a message. What is the message?  Create a bond with your highest self. This bond can be a gesture, words or a feeling. Know that it is your intention, determination and responsibility to nourish and protect that bond.

The great sunflower photo is from www.FreeFoto.com

He asked me what I do for a living, and I told him simply that I coach people who take tests. He shook his head. “Life is hard,” he said, pointing his finger and jabbing it into the air. “Hard. You have to work for everything. You know what the problem is today? Everyone wants his tummy rubbed. They want things done for them. Whatever you get in life, you have to work hard for. Life is a test.”

He’s right. Life is a test…

On the surface the word “test’  seems to be just about that which goes on in an exam room with an instructor and other students. In fact, my entire coaching career began with helping students.

But, over the years, clients invariably have told me that they’ve been able to apply the performance tools I taught them, not only to school tests, but also to life’s tests. A good example of this was a college student preparing for the MCATs.  There was a lot riding on the test– whether he’d get into medical school and which medical school got into.  His test-taking anxiety was high and this undermined his confidence in himself and his ability to focus. He learned to use the three calming tools and was able to keep his nerves in check throughout the test. At our post-test review session he reported, “Those tools you taught me helped a lot. And not just on the test. Whenever I feel myself getting worked up– like for an internship interview, or if my girlfriend and I are getting into an argument, I remember the tools — breathe, ground, and sense– and I start calming down.”

No matter what kind of job you have or what age you are, you are confronted with new obstacles every day. You have to overcome them, and you’re often expected to do that with sterling results. That is a test. Will you or won’t you perform well?

I have developed the model and designed the tools such that you can take them with you wherever you go.

Just as in the exam room, the content of life’s little tests vary. You might have toask someone on a date, give a speech, fire an employee, or host an important func-
tion. Once again, the constant is you. You’re the one who has to perform. So although you may have picked up this workbook to get by on classroom tests, you will
be able to take what you have learned out into the world. You can apply the tools as well to life as they do to school.

Here’s an exercise for you: close your eyes and imagine a stressful situation you are going to face later today or tomorrow. As you are imagining this see how your stress level goes up. Now, rewind and imagine the situation again, this time though you are consciously using the tools for calming down– breathing, grounding and sensing. Breathe deeply down to your belly, feel your feet on the floor, take in the “bigger picture” through your senses. Feel yourself calming down. Open your eyes. Know that you can face any situation — any test or challenge– when you are calmer.

Of course they have to learn the subject matter—I never make light of that—but through my experience working with a wide range of test takers for all kinds of tests, i can say with conviction that is only part of the picture.

Subject matter is always changing. You might have a test on algebra, chemistry, law, history, medieval literature or some combination of them when finals come along. But there is one thing that doesn’t change, one constant at the
center of every test, no matter what the subject, no matter what the setting.

That constant is you, the person.

It might be a driving test or a diving test. Whatever the test is for, you are the one who is taking it. The question you have to ask yourself is: “What can I learn about myself that will help me perform better in any situation? How can I take control of this process?”

Unfortunately, neither the school system, nor the test prep books, nor the courses, address you as the test taker. They address only the object of study, not the subject. The common use of the word subject is the material being studied, but the truth is, the subject is you.

When I say, “the constant is you,” I mean that you are what is certain and continual in all of your test situations.

Certainty refers to something that stays the same in spite of outer conditions. Imagine what it would be like to have this certainty in yourself when you take a test, the firm faith in success under any circumstances. You might feel rushed, you might be tired, or you might be under extreme pressure to achieve a high score. You might break a pencil or lose your place. During an oral exam you might be answering questions facing people who look at you like you know nothing. Whatever the challenge, whatever the environment, the key to test success is to be able to be constant in yourself so you can perform at your best.

Here’s an exercise for you: before you take any test sit quietly and close your eyes. See yourself sitting in the center of a pool of white light. This light nourishes, clarifies and protects you. Everything you need is in this circle: your study materials, your books, your notes, and all the people who support you and all your spiritual supports.  See yourself going to the test and taking the test, always in this circle of light, always with everything you need in it. See yourself working through the test, item by item, answering every question adequately. You are always in a circle of light.  See yourself finishing the test and leaving the test site. Open your eyes.  Remember: the constant is you.

Send in your stories about challenging tests and test environments.